|
send
page
 I volunteered for the space program for the thrill of adventure. Believe me, waiting for take-off while sitting on top of a Saturn rocket that’s 120 meters tall and weighs six-and-a-half million pounds—that’s excitement! I knew I was in for one great ride!
But what can top 11 days in space and 3 days trekking around the moon?
I was 36, with a successful military career behind me, and I began to wonder, What now? I longed for the thrill of adventure, but there were no more flights blasting off for the moon, and only sketches of a space shuttle that might be built someday.
I was bored. Fame, fortune, a spot in the history books: I had it all. But if you were a fly on the wall in my home, you would have seen that I wasn’t so hot. I was failing miserably as a husband and father. But instead of addressing my problems, I took my eyes off the moon and put them on money. Surely, I reasoned, that would bring the satisfaction that even the moon had failed to deliver.
Marriage certainly hadn’t delivered any satisfaction. Dottie and I had married in 1963. But it wasn’t long before I was wondering, Is this all there is to marriage? Within a few years we were heading full-speed toward divorce. I’d noticed there were a lot of good-looking women in the world, and a lot of them liked astronauts. I hoped Dottie would decide to leave me. Instead, she told me she was depressed and thinking about suicide. I didn’t have answers for that one.
About that time, our church hosted a “spiritual renewal weekend,� and we attended. While Dottie was engrossed in the first-person testimonies about how Christ had changed people’s lives, my mind was on the million-and-a-half dollars I’d just borrowed from the bank. I’d purchased a beer distributorship, and I figured it better work or I’d be in trouble. My money worries drowned out most of what I heard at the weekend seminar.
Though I had gone to church all my life, I had all of God I needed in that one hour every Sunday morning. Even the moon had not been a spiritual experience. I wasn’t looking for God. I knew Jesus the way you know the United States presidents—in name only.
Sure enough, my business succeeded. The money rolled in. After six months, I sold out at a handsome profit. Again I was bored.
But Dottie wasn’t. She had changed. Her depression had lifted, and she demonstrated a new, believing faith. She turned to God—not me—for answers to her problems. It was appealing, and our marriage improved.
One night we attended a Bible study that focused on one penetrating question: Who was Jesus? All my life I had said the words, ‘the Son of God,’ but I had never thought about it in a deep way. That night I came face-to-face with the option of following Him. I prayed with Dottie in the front seat of our car and gave my life over to Christ.
I didn’t see angels. Didn’t hear music. No blinding lights. But I knew what I knew. It was real. The next day, I awoke with an insatiable desire to read the Bible.
It quickly became evident to me that my lifestyle didn’t line up with the Bible’s teaching. The Bible says, ‘Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church’ (Ephesians 5:25). I had always thought marriage was a negotiated deal, like business. The Bible also speaks pointedly about using words to heal, not wound. I felt convicted; I had always been harsh with my sons, ages 11 and 13.
I had a lot of mending to do. I asked God, Dottie and my sons to forgive me. I asked God for the strength to love my wife. Fifteen years have passed since then and my love for her grows daily. I’m more in love with Dottie today than I was 29 years ago. God also graciously restored my relationship with my sons, now ages 24 and 26.
Watching God heal our family and pull us off the road to divorce has been true adventure. It cost the government $400 million for me to walk three days on the moon—and it’s over. But to walk with Jesus is free, and it lasts forever.
|
